On Her Flying Trapeze

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Manliness, Thy Name is Magoo

park1You empty everything... faster than I can refill it.

Today you snapped the wooden handle off a basket that Laylee has played with peacefully for 3 years.

You put everything in your mouth at all times.

You flail and splash like a water-churning-psycho-bot in the bath tub, never caring that your face is so covered in liquid that you can barely breathe.

You want the blinds to go DOWN in a blaze of glory.

You see it as your mission in life to have your hands sucked up in the whirly part of the vacuum cleaner and live to tell the tale...hopefully live. From what I have observed, you do not fear death.

You knock over chairs, big ones.

You eat twice as much food as Laylee, who is 2 years older than you.

You get injured frequently and while I'm distracted attending to your wounds, you move quickly on to the next venture of destruction.

You dismantled the door stopper the first time you came in contact with it…in 10 seconds flat and started sucking on the little white choking hazard tip at the end.

Breastfeeding involves sucking for 10 seconds, unlatching, laughing hysterically and attacking me for 60 seconds. You want to WRASTLE!

You also want to ingest my laptop and seem willing to use any means necessary to achieve that end.

But you know what? You've started crawling around the house at lightning speed, looking for me, and chanting "Ma ma ma ma ma ma ma MUMMMMM!"

I like you. You are a boy. I'm a bit scared. But I still like you.


Blogger Regina Clare Jane said...

Tee hee! Boys are cute, aren't they? Is he in his jumpy-jumpy?

2/12/2006 4:33 AM

Anonymous Nancy said...

LOL! What a great post. Since I have 2 girls, I think a boy would scare me a little too... ;-)

2/12/2006 4:58 AM

Blogger Heth said...

Boys and girls are sooooo different. Get ready for a rodeo ride! It's crazy fun I tell you, crazy fun.

2/12/2006 5:13 AM

Blogger blackbird said...

aahhh boys.

good in a whole different way.

2/12/2006 6:01 AM

Blogger Rachelle said...

So cute! My boy is a bit older and I think I must have gotten a mild version. You give me MUCH to look forward to.

2/12/2006 6:40 AM

Blogger Cee said...

Boys scare me too and I have three of them. The baby girl scares me the most though.

Gotta love em!

2/12/2006 9:06 AM

Blogger Shannon said...

Yay, boys!

2/12/2006 9:28 AM

Blogger Moonface said...

oooh magoo sounds so much like my own ei. the door stopper thing, eating as much as possible, putting things in the mouth, one destrucion after the other... yup. boys sure are a bit scary.

2/12/2006 10:23 AM

Blogger Amber said...

Toooooo funny! I'm another LDS, Canadian mama livin' it up in the U.S.! I've always dreamed of sea kayaking the San Juan islands so I'm envious of your environs!

I just switched over to Blogger from MSN (www.crazybloggincanuck ) and started a few postings on my Blogger account this week.

Keep up the great posts!
P.S. I have a daughter, with my ultrasound for #2 in two weeks; you have made me paranoid I'm having a BOY! :-)

2/12/2006 10:36 AM

Blogger Heather said...

Amazing how they can scare us silly. Those little amazing kiddos. When I have a boy, what shall I do?

2/12/2006 10:45 AM

Blogger Lee said...

ROFL! Little boys will give you a run for your money. My boy came first, so my little girl thinks she is supposed to do some of those behaviors! She brought the blinds down at Applebee's yesterday!!

2/12/2006 11:18 AM

Blogger jessica said...

Both my boys have chewed on those doorstop things too. If you haven't already, I suggest super gluing the white tip onto the metal part to prevent an accidental swallowing (though #1 lived to tell the tale, it was still not fun waiting for it to come out)!

The way you write about your little ones makes me smile.

2/12/2006 12:03 PM

Blogger bon said...

your boy sounds like my first two girls.... maybe it's best if Dadguy and I don't produce any boys.

2/12/2006 12:22 PM

Blogger Sugarmama said...

My, boys DO sound different, huh? I'm the mother of 2 sweet, innocent little girls, myself.

2/12/2006 12:59 PM

Blogger Susan said...

You think he scares you now--wait until he's three. Or five!

Of course, from what I hear, the teenage years are easier with boys, so there's always that.

And--my sons also ate the doorstopper thingy. What's that all about?

2/12/2006 2:01 PM

Blogger GiBee said...

I am SCARED. Very scared! My son is only 4 months old, but I've been warned about the all the trouble they can get into.

When I was a youth pastor, I had several AYCE Pizza nights, and trust me when I say ... All You Can Eat to teenage boys sometimes translates to "Eat More Than Your Body Can Possibly Hold" (and watch out, because what goes in really fast comes out really REALLY fast!). Ugh!

I hope I'm not eaten out of house and home when my son gets older!

2/12/2006 2:31 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

please tell me you are gonna let this kid play football!!!!

2/12/2006 4:56 PM

Blogger Grammy said...

AH, the energy of little ones. Why do we give THEM the vitamins, again? Boys can be wild, but if I remember correctly...in our house you were once known as "Kamakazee Kate". What goes around comes around my dear.

2/12/2006 6:08 PM

Anonymous surcie said...

I'm one of three sisters. I don't know nothin' 'bout boys. And yet, I have a 2 and 1/2 year old son. It scares me, too.

It would be physically impossible for Magoo to be any cuter.

2/12/2006 6:45 PM

Blogger Lauren said...

I had the boys first and thought all those things were normal for all babies, then the little girl came along and taught me differently! Great post.

2/12/2006 7:06 PM

Blogger emlouisa said...

What a cute little boy! I am the opposite of you, you see. I have two boys and no girls. I have no idea what I would do with a little girl. I still want one though, sniff sniff.

2/12/2006 9:26 PM

Anonymous Alissa said...

ah yes. the brute force approach to basketweaving...

2/13/2006 7:20 AM

Blogger Goslyn said...

Oh my. Here I thought you were writing about MY son. LOL. Magoo sounds like just as much of a handful as Tommy, these days. His new trick is shredding magazines and attempting to eat them. When that doesn't work, he topples trashcans.

2/13/2006 8:01 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I remember when my first boy started walking.
I would sit and stare at him and wonder "What the hell?"

My daughter was SO peaceful and quiet and easy.

I wish I could tell you that they grow out of it.

Mine is now 14 and can still break ANYthing.

2/13/2006 8:33 AM

Blogger HangerMom said...

Oh, I'm terrified that one of my future children will be a boy. I have no brothers, and my two daughters are so peaceful. The playdates with have with my friends' little boys just scare me more. Thanksfully my husband has 6 brothers (and is himself a boy) so he should have an idea how to handle one...

I love your writing style. Thanks for making me smile!

2/13/2006 11:14 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

First time at your blog - I have one of those little disasters myself, after a calm, sweet girl. I can't believe I like it so much considering how scared I was about raising a boy.

2/15/2006 12:45 PM

Anonymous Pam said...

I love to hear about Magoo. I just got done with the bear/wolf cub scout den meeting at my house, and I can truthfully say that boys continue to be boys in most energetic and wonderful and very busy ways. Ohmagoshshshsh! I loved my boys and my girls too. So greatful to experience both. Most definitely different and delightful, too. :)

2/15/2006 6:32 PM


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