Watch What You Say

I never knew how often I said most of the annoying things I say until my oldest child started talking. Wow! I say some crazy-weird stuff. Hearing it repeated back to me, especially in the skewed way that she remembers it, is frightening at times.

One time I asked her to move as I was shutting the car door so I wouldn't bonk her on the head. A couple of days later, we were in a store and out of nowhere she said, "Mommy, please don't bonk me on the head, okay?" Um....yeah....I'll try really hard to restrain myself. Let's get out of here quick, before someone calls CPS.

Here are some responses she's given recently because Magoo was annoying her:
-“Magoo! CHILL!”
-“What - THE - heck?!”
(These responses are only brought on when he does something hideously obnoxious like breathe or look in her direction.)

Yesterday she was obsessed with the idea of spurting grey-matter.
Laylee: You know the book with the yellow fish, the red fish, the white fish and the blue fish?
Me: Uh-huh.
Laylee: The white fish sneezes his brains out through his nose.
Me: I don’t remember that part.
Laylee: Yeah, but Daddy doesn’t sneeze his nose brains out because he puts water up there.

A little later as we’re playing a matching game on the carpet, Laylee keeps matching items that don’t go together and then laughing herself silly.

Laylee: You know what Mommy? Sometimes I laugh my BRAINS OUT!

Then I start questioning myself. Do I use the expression “my brains out” all the time?

I was crying my brains out. Stop yelling your brains out. I’m sneezing my brains out. That was so funny, I laughed my brains out. I’m not sure.

I think sometimes I can say something once and she just picks it up and latches onto it as her favorite phrase. But still…It makes me want to watch every word that comes out of my mouth.

Who wants their three year old to be the one in the church nursery saying, “That’s flippin’ hilarious” or “I’m gonna kick his trash”?

On the topic of watching what I say, I am quoted this month in Babytalk Magazine, talking about how I let Magoo act as a human vacuum cleaner, eating food off our floor. This quote reaffirms to me that I made the right decision in using made-up names for my kids on the blog.

And for all you new and potential bloggers out there, if you choose to go the nickname route with your kids, choose nicknames you wouldn’t mind being used by all of your family and friends who read the blog, including yourself. We chose these names for the blog because they were nicknames we had used every once in a while in the past. At this point, we call them Laylee and Magoo quite often and I’ve had family members tell me they have trouble remembering their real names.

The Babytalk article is great. I wish I’d read it when I was starting my blog last year. (And there’s more than a little giddiness around here about DYM.com being mentioned. Some people try to play it cool, but I can see right through them, especially since they were the ones to initiate the hand-holding.) Sadly, the article’s author, Meagan Francis’s blog went AWOL right before the April issue went to press. Her blog can now be found at momwithmore.blogspot.com.

For some weekend fun, please check out the Carnival of Kid Comedy over at Life in a Shoe. Kim does a great job compiling funny stories for weekend reading enjoyment.

And finally, speaking of reading, if you haven’t given me your favorite book choice for the great reads list I’m compiling, please head over and do it. We’re just 7 away from 100.