On Her Flying Trapeze

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

To Clarify

When I read about Piglet being blown away, I wonder what gauge weapon will be used and who will be wielding it. Eyeore seems the most unstable mentally, although Rabbit has shown himself capable of physical aggression in the past. Kanga is right out, but Roo wants so badly to fit in. Who's to say that he's not planning the job, maybe earn him some respect from the whole gang? They all made nice at the end of The Heffalump Movie but I think that book


is pretty solid evidence of the rising tide of violence in their little world. Christo-Robinizzle is too high up in the food chain to take anyone out himself. He'd undoubtedly use one of his henchmen. I don't think it would be too hard to convince T-I-double-Guh-ER to "bounce" little pink, if you knowahmsayin'. After that whole forgery of documents and posing as a member of his long lost Tigger posse, in The Tigger Movie, our boy is not exactly right with Mr. T. At least the Pooh’s got his back… for now.

Got any theories, yo?


Blogger Margaret said...

Remind me NEVER to conspire against you.

Or play "Clue" with you.

Or "Mafia."

5/11/2006 12:19 AM

Blogger meredith said...

Tigger is a naughty tiger, he's been caught in a lie before, he's my suspect.

5/11/2006 2:08 AM

Blogger Jeana said...

Oh my word! I got the reference yesterday and thought that was funny. Reading this I could not stop laughing. Daring Young Mom waxes gangsta-esque. Izzle. YOu didn't mention Owl, the brains of the posse. Maybe he's still bitter after being called an egg-head in school. AND he's the only one who knows how to write, so he could totally arrange it for hire. Or even mail-order an Uzzi. Which I could not, because I have no idea is I just spelled that right.

And we know he has it in for Piglet, remember how he found that house for Eeyore and really it was Piglet's house so then Piglet had to go mooch off of Pooh? After his plot to put Pinky on the street failed he was bound to have a vendetta.

5/11/2006 4:13 AM

Blogger Kelli in the Mirror said...

Or Gopher? He seems to have a lot of pent-up aggression as well.

5/11/2006 5:19 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah I think gopher because he's from the underground and stuff. He also looooves to blow stuff up! He's the man to do the job!

5/11/2006 5:59 AM

Blogger Peter said...

I don't trust any of them. They all seem a little bit off to me.

5/11/2006 6:25 AM

Blogger Heth said...

Another vote for Gopher. He gets a little crazy with the dynamite.

5/11/2006 6:42 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know, it's always the quiet ones that break mamma's heart. Do I dare say Pooh himself? sometimes it's the one you'd least expect. He says he's trying to help him keep from being "blown away," I think we have a little O.J action here.

5/11/2006 6:43 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, where is Nantie Meg? I'm a little concerned! Haven't heard from her since 4-26!

5/11/2006 6:44 AM

Blogger Tess said...

What Piglet didn't know is when they were asking him what size shoes he wears, they were making a mold for his concrete shoes

5/11/2006 6:51 AM

Anonymous jess said...

That little pig better watch his back, Dog. I've heard that OWL may be packing a little heat.

5/11/2006 7:48 AM

Anonymous fantasy man said...


5/11/2006 7:57 AM

Blogger melnel said...

This is a scarey post for me, since I've always identified myself with piglet.

The whole thing just leaves me with a feeling that someone is out to get me!

5/11/2006 8:01 AM

Blogger Heather said...

I'd have to go for Gopher. That gopher is one shady character.

5/11/2006 8:10 AM

Blogger ABC Momma said...

Rabbit--he's always trying to get rid of little pests.

5/11/2006 8:17 AM

Blogger Goslyn said...

I'm going with Rabbit - I can't believe ABC momma was the first to suggest him! He was my first pick, right off. He's so anal-retentive. He'd probably off piglet just to get back at Pooh for getting stuck in his (rabbit's) house. How's that for vengence. Eat my hunny, I blow away your little buddy.

5/11/2006 9:15 AM

Blogger Aunt Murry said...

It was POOH! The dunb thing is all an act!!!!

5/11/2006 11:13 AM

Blogger a. nonny spouse said...

For the true aspiring gangsta: Gizoogle.

5/11/2006 11:20 AM

Blogger Amy A. said...

Somebody rent this woman a grown-up DVD and fast! :)

5/11/2006 12:40 PM

Blogger Lei said...

I have no idea what you are getting at... ;) Lol. If only children's entertainment WERE that interesting!

5/11/2006 1:28 PM

Blogger Susan said...

As I read this, I am sitting with my sick child watching the Book of Pooh video he picked out at the Blockbuster. You know, the Book of Pooh, where the characters are all computer rendered puppets.

They look like a gang. And now I'm freaked out.

5/11/2006 1:52 PM

Blogger Nettie said...

Remember when Rabbit tried to lose Tigger in the woods? I think its him. But I wouldn't rule out 'Ol Cris Robbin. After all, he does head up the stairs, "draggin' Pooh behind him." (That line always cracks my kids up!)

5/11/2006 1:55 PM

Blogger Nettie said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

5/11/2006 1:55 PM

Blogger Jeff said...

It was the woozles.

5/11/2006 2:14 PM

Anonymous shannon from rocks in my dryer said...

can't. type. laughing. too. hard.

5/11/2006 2:25 PM

Blogger Praying for your Prodigal said...

All I can offer....is....



5/11/2006 2:57 PM

Blogger Shalee said...


I think Eeyore will do everyone in... He's like the Unibomber... all by himself, in a shack in the woods... you know the one who seems a little too down and then one day he can't live with himself or anyone else anymore so at the next "Hooray for Pooh" party that Christopher throws, he pulls out a gunner and blows them all away, finally turning the weapon on himself.

It's messy, but everyone knows that he only had fluff for brains.

5/11/2006 3:06 PM

Blogger elliespen said...

Good. Grief.

All y'all are forgetting that our Piglet can take care of himself. He manages to escape the flood, he foils any and all attempts to send him away on a kite, he evades a jagular (who now has got his back), he has that suspiciously abbreviated "Trespassers Will" sign above his house, he does NOT go missing in the mist, and (for those of you who have read the book) he bravely takes on Roo's identity in the great kidnapping plot.

I think EEYORE needs to watch his back more than my fine pink friend.

It's already started, actually. Remember when Piglet was being the kite? He managed to drag Pooh through Eeyore's house of sticks and knock it down, while he gave Rabbit a hand by harvesting his carrots for him. Obviously Rabbit and Piglet are cronies, while Eeyore and Owl represent the opposing gang (Eeyore got even by giving Owl Piglet's house) -- and our bear of very little brain seems to be an unsuspecting pawn in this dangerous game.

5/11/2006 4:42 PM

Blogger No Cool Story said...

Hundred Acre Wood Mafia = Gopher

Hey DYM, I’m glad you’re still alive
and bloging away (because you know, I LOVE your blog).

Now all we have to do is wait for your house NOT to fall down. Or Gopher to come git ya.

5/11/2006 5:49 PM

Anonymous helene said...

Hi --Just delurking to invite you to add your tradecard to the Supermom Gallery

5/11/2006 7:29 PM

Blogger EvaRob said...

Agree with previous posters. It is SO Eeyore...he freaks me out....he's such a downer in that crazy honey filled town.

5/11/2006 7:44 PM

Blogger Dapoppins said...

I drop by and see that there is a hit out on P-p-piglet!" I think it is Rabit, he is the one who tries to loose Tigger, he is also the one behind all the huffalump trap building and he has expierence battleing cops, or is that crops? He is a jittery bunny but he's got the nerve...

5/12/2006 6:48 AM

Blogger Lauren said...

I can NOT even believe that Pooh and the gang went this bad in just the few years that I've stopped reading them to the kids. What's this world coming to? *sigh*

5/12/2006 10:28 AM

Blogger momof3busyboys said...

I am sitting here laughing So hard I got tears coming down my cheeks!
I have got to say My theory says it is Eyore who has it out for piglet! He is so quiet, and I agree it is always the loners that are profiled on all the cop shows as maniac killers!

5/12/2006 1:54 PM

Blogger Lianne said...

Thank you for referring to the "real" Pooh and not Disney's caricature of Pooh.

I was thinking, wouldn't it be funny to have Pooh Oracle Cards, or something. Everyday you could pull some "message" from them like:

"Today looks like it holds trouble for you, you'd better stay home with your honey pot."

I'm thinking I might be on to something and I could make millions bastardizing A.A. Milne just like Disney!

What a cynic I am!

5/12/2006 4:11 PM

Blogger Not Too Pensive said...

I wonder what gauge weapon will be used and who will be wielding it

My theory? You've spent too much time with your brother...

5/12/2006 7:25 PM

Blogger emlouisa said...

Okay. Thanks for making me snort popcorn up my nose. Do you KNOW how painful that is?

5/12/2006 8:36 PM

Anonymous Heather from One Woman's World said...

mwahaha! You are too hilarious!

5/13/2006 8:26 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Can't beleive nobody has said it yet...

wait for it....

A frickin' twelve-gauge what do you think!!! Gosh!!!


5/13/2006 3:38 PM

Anonymous LammyAnn said...

COMMENT #40~~ Happy mother's day to one of the greatest!
(oh, and Love me some a.a.milne in gangstah)

5/14/2006 12:17 PM

Anonymous Pam in Utah said...

Kathryn, Happy Mother's Day to a most sweet and good mother. Funny, too. :) Uh, yuup.

5/14/2006 10:34 PM


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